I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
