Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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