can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
