the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize