I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
