oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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