You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
