would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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