He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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