put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Randomize
