He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Randomize
