If that was your dad, he is hot
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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