11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
