I'm laying in your front yard are you home
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize