SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
