The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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