Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
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