I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
