I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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