i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
