His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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