also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize