we were pretty classy up until the second keg
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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