Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
