Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
