i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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