just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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