New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Did I show you my penis last night?
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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