I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
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