Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
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I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
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