Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
i believe in u and ur pee
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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