remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
i think im in europe. pls send help
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
