My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
