Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I'd wear matching sweaters with you
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize