I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize