ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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