Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize
