I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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