You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize