fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
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I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
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Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
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