Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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