If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
He kissed a someone with a penis
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
