i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Randomize
