I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize