Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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