We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Drake has all the answers
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
