I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
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I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
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And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
I have post one night stand depression
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