I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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