the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
