i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize