I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
it hurts more in the daytime
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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